Feeling Much Better

Well, since I've been keeping you all pretty well informed, I figure I may as well continue to keep you well informed. I've been feeling much better this weekend, Friday was a tiring day, from announcing things in church, to feeling quite sad all day, to it being Good Friday, which is often a day for quieter reflection - it was tough. It was also the end of a very long week. I had a good cry at the end of the day - I was still having physical pain, and that was a little scary too.

Friday seemed to be a turning point, though. Saturday was a little better, Sunday our service was good, I directed a play and that went over really well, and it just felt good for people to know, and to be able to move on because of that. It no longer felt like there was a big secret in our lives. There are many women (and families) in our church that can share my pain, because there are many who have experienced it - and that too was a comfort. As well, after Friday the physical pain subsided, which relieved some of my fears. Now things physically seem to be mostly over, which is a really nice feeling, and I think it helps me to be able to recover emotionally as well.

Making connections with people, getting it out in the open, and being able to be honest about what I've been through, both with myself, with people close to me, and to a wider circle of our church and work families has been such a blessing. God has placed amazing people in my life who have been such a comfort in many ways in the last week. I feel like I can start to look outside myself again a little bit, which is a nice place to be.

I'm not saying I'm not still sad, I'm not saying it's not still weird. There are still times I feel pregnant, and still times where something happens and I'm like "Oh, that's a pregnancy symptom" and I have to remind myself that it's not, BUT I'm continuing down the road that felt like it was at a dead stop last week, and I feel like that's a good place to be in right now.

Thank you for continuing to pray - we can feel the strength it brings us.