**Note - the following really does have to do with strange vomit, so if you've made a pact with yourself to avoid funny vomit stories, please, read no further**
Like I said - used to. I figured, what with getting pregnant and all, that record would not stand, but lucky me, I managed to avoid throwing up the entire few weeks I was pregnant (ha - I've finally figured out how to avoid morning sickness...) and NOW, not that I am most definately NOT pregnant - I throw up.
But HOW did I throw, as I said - it's strange. I was walking down the road, drinking pop. Something many of us do on a regular basis - both walking, and drinking pop, and perhaps, something you have even done recently together. As I did. Suddenly I felt the urge to belch. Being a teacher, that urge often has to be quashed, which is not as fun. So...seeing as there was no one around, and I was out and about and there wasn't going to be anyone seeing or hearing me, I figured now was a GREAT time to belch away. And so I did. Only it turns out, it wasn't a belch - somehow, instead of just air coming up the windpipe, there was food that had formerly gone down that felt the urge to come back up. And so it did. And I threw up. Just a little - enough to get it up my nose, not enough to leave an obvious mark on the road. And then I kept walking home. And laughed to myself.
Here I am - not drinking alcohol, not drunk, yet walking down the road and puking like a drunkard. For no aparent reason. I went home, and called Brad and laughed as I told him.
I don't know if the fake belch / vomit thing is a common occurence, or if it's just one more thing that makes me special, but it sure made me laugh!
5 comments:
Thats Okay, One time Dan called me at work to inform me that he forgot to eat breakfast but still took his morning vitamins... well apparently his stomach didn't like the no food/multivitamin combo and so he suddenly had to puke at work. He told me his puke was like a technicolour green... he was pretty impressed with himself and called me to brag about his weird puke. I laughed.
So perhaps bragging about strange puke is a family trait we just never knew about before! Bec? Rob? Any stories???
Umm. . . none I want to post here.
I'll tell you, though, teaching kindergarten/elementary school to little kids for two or three years, and you'll get a few throw-up stories in your pocket. (Not that any kids ever threw up in my pocket, thought that would have been the champion if one had.) My worst was the day Eric and Willy were in the bathroom, and they had a pee fight, and peed on each other. Eric thought it would be funny, Willy said "stop it", so Eric did it again, and Willy retaliated.
(be warned: this next paragraph is gross -- but, apparently, a family trait)
Does that "eating meat too fast/gagging" thing I do count? I suppose about as much as Deb's pukelet. Sometimes if I'm having an allergic reaction I produce prodigous amounts of phlegm (while breaking out in hives) -- the day I discovered my buckwheat allergy by eating a lot of buckwheat noodles, I had to spit phlegm out the taxi window on the way to the hospital. I tried only to do it when the taxi was at rest, to avoid wind-tunnel effects, but by the time I arrived at the hospital, there was a funny, shiny sheen on the taxi car door. (Sorry, taxi driver, and sorry people who get grossed out by puke stories: I taught my students the phrase "overshare" last month.)
Okay, in spite of three pregnancies with plenty of nausea and a little vomitting, my best story comes from a time when I was not pregnant. You see, the granola jar had been sitting on the window sill a little too long (a few weeks or so), and I finally decided to finish the stuff off. It didn't taste very good, but I emptied my bowl. My stomach started to complain, and just as we were going out the door, decided to empty itself. I threw up in the snow beside our front door and immediately felt much better. The next spring, the grass in that spot was three times higher and twice as green as all the rest of the grass!
Sweet. Thanks for sharing guys. I love that we all have puke stories. And I love the word Pukelet, I'll remember that one Rob!
You guys rock!
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