Listening to a Heartbeat.

It's amazing to go to a doctor's visit and hear our little one's heartbeat on the Doppler machine. It's a machine that amplifies sounds from inside, so if the baby moves, you not only don't hear the heartbeat, but you can actually hear the sound of the movement! When I talk, Brad says he can hear both me normally, as well as how I sound from inside my belly (that I don't hear, but he says it's kinda funny).

Well, the reason he says it's funny, I'll get to. When we first tried to hear Go-Yi's heartbeat, it couldn't be found (part of the reason we went for our first ultrasound), but as the doctor was trying to find the heartbeat, suddenly we heard this HUGE loud static-y noise - when asked what it was, the doctor told us it was my bowels. Weird.

So, Brad & I became used to not getting to hear Go-Yi's heartbeat due to our baby liking to be difficult - it wasn't something that made me anxious (after the first time) - and we started to joke about it. Well, one day Brad made me laugh while the Doppler was on - I tell you, there's a lot of work that goes into laughter, and don't let anyone tell you different, because suddenly there were these massive noises of muscles contracting and things moving - it sounded LOUD - and only made me laugh more.

This laughing during Doppler has happened now three times or so - twice with my own doctor, but the first time we went to the maternity clinic I wanted to make a good impression, and instead I got the giggles so badly the doctor had to stop (this is when Brad told me he could hear me laugh from the Doppler amplifying it).

I was going to end this post with the sound of Go-Yi's heartbeat, but unfortunately it's not as easy for me to post sound as just cutting and pasting it in, you have to put the sound somewhere first, or something - I'm disappointed, but perhaps Brad can do it one Mission's Fest is over.

Love you all!

It's 1:30 am...

And after crashing after work and falling asleep too early - now I am awake, and suffering from heartburn that is possibly going to turn into nausea. I figured being upright may calm my stomach - and keep Brad awake certainly isn't doing anything useful, so hey - why not post some pictures??

Brad did a photo shoot a few weeks back - his first foray into a professional studio setting with all the fancy lights etc...that entails - and these are some of the shots he came up with.

I feel like I'm already WAY bigger than I was here - but this will definitely help you see how different I look than I did before baby...

So - here we go...a few pictures from the shoot:


This next one's from a cool angle - I think Brad was on a ladder (he may be tall, but not THIS tall).




This next one is just a nice shot of me - when you're pregnant, and just feel fat a lot (or at least I do), it's nice to be reminded that I can still look good - thanks, Brad...
Next is one that's just a "Classic Maternity Picture"...

The next two show the power of computers. Brad turned This:
Into This:

I thought I'd show you the original, just so you didn't think I was naked (without explanation, Brad's gotten a few weird looks when showing this picture to people - the costumer in me instantly notices things like the bow in the back, but others may not notice such details, and get a little confused.

So - there you go - the first belly pictures - and I think they're GREAT! I wouldn't want to do studio shooting all the time, but this was a lot of fun for one night (although it was late!!) and I'm glad we got a bunch of shots so we can show you the best of the best.

We'll try to keep you more updated with pictures as the rest of the pregnancy progresses - but I'm certainly not inspired at 6:00 at night to look my best and get pictures - that's for sure!

A Moving Baby

Last night for the first time Go-Yi kept me up with it's kicking (not for too long though, I didn't mind). Generally, at night, I enjoy a good 15 minutes or so of lying in bed before I fall asleep, and I just rest my hand on my belly and feel the kid moving and kicking. I think if you were watching my belly some days, you could probably SEE something, but it's dark & I'm under the covers, and not super motivated to get cold just so MAYBE I can see something move. So - instead I just put my hand on and enjoy the company of my little one. Last night (or should I say very early morning) for the first time, Brad could feel something too. There's been a few times where he's tried, and as soon as he puts his hand on my, all movement stops (except once, when there was a good strong kick, but I instantly gasped because I was so excited Brad might have felt something, that my gasp was more movement than the kick was - and how could he be sure he'd even felt anything). Once or twice when he's been waiting he'll ask: "was that something?" when I felt nothing on the inside - so last night was cool. I just laid on my side and his hand was resting on me - he was semi-comatose, but he could definitely feel the movement. When asked about it later - Brad's super excited response to how he felt about it was "I felt tired". Funny, a very similar reaction to when I told him we were pregnant with Stretch. He's going to be a great - laid-back father, which I will enjoy watching.

Only 111 days to the due date...

Our Baby has a Name!

Brad & I have been looking for a name for this fetus for half of a pregnancy already (that's right, I'm over halfway there already). Now, we were going to name it Zaggy Moondirt - but then when Dan & Caryn told us their fetus name was Ziggy Stardust, we figured that name was out...

So, we kept coming up with names, and they just wouldn't stick. I personally liked Bob for quite some time, but Brad said it wasn't asexual enough...picky picky...

So, a few weeks ago we were talking about cellphones - and Brad told me that there were areas in Africa where cells have become so prevalent that people don't have house numbers on their houses anymore, they have cell numbers, so when you get there, you can call them to let them know you're there. Then he said that whole idea is quite different from the years when people didn't even have doors on their houses, so people would call "go-go-go-yi" (go yee) which meant "knock knock" to let people know they were there. I thought Go-yi would be a fun name for the baby, since right around the time we had the conversation, I was also feeling Go-yi move and kick for the first time. So we tried it out for a while, to make sure it stuck, and it has.

So...we'd like to introduce our fetus to you all. It's name is Go-yi and it's moving and kicking and knocking on my belly every day now, which is kinda fun, and kinda weird. In less then 5 months Go-yi should be ready to meet the world. AUGHHHHH!!!

We bought our first baby thing

And typical of us - it's nothing practical. We've got to ease into these things...


His name is Geefer Giraffe (that's right, ladies and gentlemen G IS for Giraffe). And he's adorable. I figure if our child is going to end up as tall as his/her father, he/she may as well get used to comments about giraffes. And look how cute he is.

How Mary Must Have Felt

You know - this Christmas there's a strong connection for me with Mary and her journey (go figure). I think we paint too pretty of a picture of her (as per usual with biblical characters - let's be honest). She was (to quote my Grade 8 drama production) "fat and bloated, and you expect me to walk where???" She was just a normal person, fit into the context of her society. Telling people that she was pregnant before she was married wasn't going to get better by saying "but no, it's GOD who got me pregnant"...SURE it was Mary - and God also got the other unwed mother pregnant in town....SURE.... She had to deal with stares, threats to her life (adultery was worth stoning, and being engaged was as good as being married), the stigma attached - as well as having to go through nine months of pregnancy. We forget about the TIME involved between the angel's visit and the birth - 9 months is a LONG time, and yet...scarily short...

So - poor Mary - and then, to top it off, at the end of a VERY long journey, she ends up giving birth - in a stable! And if there was no room for them in the inn, imagine how many extra animals must have been housed in the stable - all those people got to that inn somehow... Then there's the humour of our interpretation of the baby being born. It was a silent night, it was holy, there was only peace and quiet and into that peace and quiet and holiness, a baby magically appeared in a manger. Little Lord Jesus, no crying he made, and evidently, Mary's birth was painless and miraculously peaceful too (in our Sunday School drama Jesus appeared from behind a poinsettia - I said to a friend - I hope it's that easy for me when I give birth...Oh, there's my baby, behind a poinsettia). We make this out to be a beautiful serene scene, with Mary able to give birth without even knocking her halo off kilter.

Somehow, going through what I am right now, and looking forward to what I'm looking forward to, I think it was a little louder, dirtier, messy, with Mary yelling in pain, and the animals bleating a response at every contraction. Perhaps that tickled Joesph's funny bone and he'd laugh, which would only make Mary more frazzled. By making it into a holy event ONLY - we lose some of the humanity that made Christ's birth so amazing. Our Saviour, the Son of GOD, became a little baby - born the same way all of us are - he was helpless, and had to cry to communicate what he needed, just like all little babies. The awesomeness of Mary & Joseph's responsibility, to provide for the son of God when he was incapable of taking care of himself, that gets lost in what we look at in the story of Christ. His humanity is part of what makes our faith so amazing, and God's love for us so incredible.

Jesus came to rule over the earth, to change the world, to give us hope of eternity with our father in heaven - and he did it in a slobber covered manger, with the normal pains of childbirth promised to all women in Genesis, visited by the dregs of society (shepherds), to spend 30+ years growing up in a society that KNEW he was illegitimate. All this, so he could die an excruciating death. For me and you, and my little unborn baby. That inspires more awe in me than a silent, peaceful birth with a baby who freakishly never cries.

Merry Christmas - I hope it will be merry for some REAL reasons, and not only imagined ones.

Last Day!

FINALLY the last day of school is here! It's been a long haul - and one very difficult class to add to the mix, and now I'm finally done!! (Well, for 2 weeks anyway).

Plans for the holidays...of COURSE not! Brad & I would never PLAN for our holidays, it just takes all the fun out of it!
Have I bought my gifts yet...or even started...of COURSE not! Brad & I do best with little to no shopping time left.
Have we decorated...of COURSE not!

What do I want for Christmas?
Well - we've been looking at things people have qualified as "stocking stuffers" in their advertisements. Evidently it's not cost that determines what goes in a stocking, it's size - so $100 gift certificate to a Spa? Stocking Stuffer. MP3 Players? Stocking Stuffers. The new iPhone? Stocking Stuffer. BUT if you spent $20 on a REALLY BIG stuffed teddy bear - now THAT would belong under a tree!

So - I'd love some fabulously expensive stocking stuffers. I've also decided that someone coming to clean my house between now and May would be wondrously amazing. Some Deb pampering would be nice (you know, manicures, pedicures that sort of thing), and I've discovered I'm running out of shoes that fit my ever swelling feet - that's right - even your feet grow when you're pregnant.

Other than that...Some energy - no more nausea (this week has been MUCH better than last) - sleep - less stress - students who are all positive and ready to work every class - there's lots of things I'd love to find under the tree if it was possible.

At the same time - I've had a number of students bring me gifts - and that's always so cool to me that they'd do that. And this week I haven't thrown up every day (it's amazing how doing that for a while changes your perspective of what a "good" day is). So there's good and not good.

In the end - it's the last day of school, and now I can finally move on to getting into Christmas mode - which is fun. And then - less than 2 weeks until my birthday - we can't forget about that of course...

I'd write more, but there's a few things I need to do, and some things I think need their own posts to say - so stay tuned!

The Life of a Photographer's Assistant

Brad's been doing a lot of work with his friend Greg taking pictures this holiday season. Greg's got a company that does things like Santa Claus at the mall & corporate gig's where you can get your photo taken on the company's dime. It's been very cool for him, he comes home with some interesting stories, and gets paid to take pictures that are a whole lot less pressure to take than wedding pictures are (given it's a full day event, and if your pictures don't turn out it's not a good thing...not that our pictures have ever NOT turned out, but still...it's a lot of stress). SO...this has been a lot of fun for him, and it's been good for him to hang out with Greg & the other photographers and assistants who work on these jobs.

This week Brad worked Saturday, Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and has another gig on Sunday. I hope this means I'm going to get a nice Christmas present (ha ha ha). It's a pretty neat set-up Greg's got. Brad takes the pictures on a digital camera that connects directly to a laptop. From there someone processes them (crops them, puts on the company logo and a border or something like that) and then they print it right to a printer that's there, and within 2 minutes from the time you got your photo taken, you've got a picture in hand in a nice little booklet. Pretty cool.

Well, one of the computer technicians is moving to Edmonton, and I expressed a willingness to help out - a little extra cash for me would be nice too, and if I don't help, then I don't see Brad for many MANY nights. So, Greg said he'd be up for that, so on Tuesday we went to a swanky (and I mean SWANKY) party at an exclusive club (if you're not a ka-gillionaire, don't bother trying to be a member) and I learned how to crop, edit and print pictures from Tim. Last night, I was on my own, and for 6 hours Brad took pictures & I printed them for people at a nice hotel in Vancouver.

A few things I (and Brad at times) discovered:
Rich people are just the same as everyone else - it's us poor people who put them on a pedestal and they probably couldn't care less about it (especially when you're a ka-gillionaire).
We work well together - communicating well, talking to the clients in a similar way - keeping each other informed about what's going on.
Drunk people say "I love you" more than non-drunk people.
Having a stomach bug (or food poisoning, I'm not sure which), and being pregnant is NOT a nice combo when processing pictures for 6 hours. I think I lost 90% of my body's water last night one way or the other, and I felt what felt like contractions (I don't think the baby likes me having a bug). I did it, and it was manageable (mostly), but I sure didn't eat anything, and called the nurse's hotline when I got home. BOY was I relieved when she told me that kind of reaction is NOT part of a normal pregnancy - I sure wouldn't want to experience it more than once!!! She gave me some good advice, and I'm feeling somewhat better this morning, which is nice.

One of the coolest things about the evening, though, was at the end when we were cleaning up. We chatted with Greg and he said that I was incredible (worth a million dollars was one of the phrases he used) and that he'd never seen someone pick this stuff up so quickly, or be so capable within an evening. He really appreciated that he didn't have to come over and problem solve all night long, but that I could figure things out and make it happen. That felt good to me. And when we asked him how much I should be making the invoice out for, he said "Normally for someone starting out, I pay $**, but since you're so great already, you can bill what I'd charge someone who's been doing this for a while ($10 more than the previous number!!). I said to Brad later that I got a raise before I even started working! I was pretty excited about that, and Brad was pretty proud of me. And if I can do that well as I leave my post to throw up and I look like a ghost - imagine how great I'll be next time! (And Greg has said he'd like there to be a next time, which is cool).

I'm glad this is still something that's mostly Brad's gig, but it's fun, from time to time to help out and be a part of things.

Love to you all.

We heard a heartbeat!!!

It was pretty strong - and kinda cool. It's weird to think that there's a little something growing inside of me (many people my age who grew up with the movie "Alien" where something comes out of Sigourney Weaver's belly and tries to bite her can relate). My imagination gets to me sometimes...

We heard the heartbeat on Monday - which was good. The last TWO times we went to the doctor he couldn't find it (at 12 weeks and 14 weeks) so when we got there for our last check-up at 16 weeks, we were glad to finally hear a SUPER strong heartbeat - I guess our baby was just hiding & playing games, but now it's too big to do that anymore!

Speaking of too big - it's about 6 inches now (that's 15 cm for you metric types) - sometimes I hold my fingers that wide apart on my belly and think "How can something that big be in there, and I can't feel it yet?" And then I realize that for many months my sleep will be interrupted by feeling it move, and I realize I can't complain.

When we were listening to the heartbeat the doctor said "can you hear that...it's going "it's a boy, it's a boy, it's a boy", Brad, of course had to correct him and tell him it's a girl, but we'll see who's right in the end. Guessing games are fun, and I'm glad we don't know - it makes it more fun this way in my opinion.

Superheroes of the world...UNITE!!!

Brad and I were talking yesterday about great comedy improv superheroes and their super side kicks. We were inspired by Stephen Colbert who said he was going to have a hyperbole competition with George Clooney that was going to be the most amazing incredible competition EVER...(or something along those lines). So, we've joked about this before and came up with "Delayed Reaction Man" and his sidekick "Jumps to Conclusion Boy". Yesterday the hero we came up with was "Hyperbole Man" and his faithful sidekick "Over-reaction Boy". Could you imagine?

"Over-Reaction Boy - the garbage truck hasn't come yet - this is the most horrible thing that has ever happened - "

"Oh no!! We're going to be over-run with garbage in a week, our city will be destroyed within the month, quick, we need to start eating garbage to save the planet!!"

"Over-Reaction Boy - put that that tin can you're eating down. Here comes the garbage truck"

and on and on...

Do you have any fun suggestions for ridiculous superheroes, or their fabulous sidekicks?

You know...

I've realized that almost all of my posts either have ... in the title or !!!

How about that for random.

Otherwise - I'm tired, make that exhausted - so tired that last night I couldn't even comprehend dinner beyond what was easily accessible from the spot I'd crashed onto on the couch. Ketchup chips & peanuts...yum...not feeling so great either - just blah all around this week.

*sigh*

I'm still just DEB...

It was a tough week to be telling everyone we're expecting, because I've been so busy with OTHER things at the same time that it's been hard for me to be excited about stuff (I don't know how excited I'll be, after all, there's a whole lot of responsibility involved with a baby...) ANYWAY, it's becoming apparent that being pregnant and people knowing means a whole lot of things that I wasn't hoping it would mean. Here's just a FEW examples from the last week:
*Being called mom or my personal non-favourite "Preggers" rather than Deb. Suddenly I have completely lost my identity.
*The entire span of my conversations with most people go from "so how far along are you" to "when I gave birth..." and that's about it.
*On the opening night of my play (which I spent hours and months on - based entirely on my skills in theatre and directing) what gets announced to the entire audience? That I'm pregnant. Oh yeah...I wasn't asked beforehand...
*"Are you sure that's good for the baby?" A question I heard from someone who's basically a stranger...how is this your business? Are you really calling me a bad mother?? (If I'm to pull it to the extreme)
*Belly touching...from aquaintances...men...people invading my personal space just to touch my belly, even though at this point, my baby is so LOW down that if someone ACTUALLY wanted to pat my baby I could sue them for sexual harassment.
*Suddenly there's a whole lot of personal space and personal questions that people feel they can ask just because I'm going to give birth to our child (and it has no connection with those people who are invading).

What do I like? That Brad & I are finally both able to accept the fact that we're pregnant. That we can talk about the baby and it's a good thing. That I can look at pictures of the ultrasound and know that little baby's ours (I also love it when people tell me the picture looks like me...and I say it looks like his father, of COURSE). That although I'm tired & feeling just weird, there's still the knowledge that this pregnancy seems to be working, and that's a great thing. God is good, even when people are insensitive.

Dress Rehearsals

Dress rehearsals are happening this week for Anne - I was up so late Monday night that my stomach was NOT happy with me. Yesterday I was asleep by 8:30 and I still woke up this morning exhausted. I've been so busy, but my body doesn't get over sleep deprivation - normally if I miss say 4 hours of sleep, I just sleep an extra two hours the next night and I'm ok. Not now, now if I miss 4 hours, my body keeps reminding me that I owe it 4 hours of sleep, so I'm still not caught up, AND have practice tonight and tomorrow (and opening night on Friday).

Pray for me!!!

We're Getting a BABY!!!

YAY! We're so excited to be able to share this with you guys finally! It's been a long three months, but at the same time, we're glad to be able to share good news with you guys this time around. We felt so hesitant to say anything until we saw that little baby on the ultrasound, and saw it's little heart beat and saw it's mouth open and close and it's arms & legs move around. What a cool feeling to know that that little baby is a part of our family already. It's funny, both Brad & I have commented that seeing the ultrasound was odd because the baby was moving and when you see the pictures (as we'll post soon), they're static, but when you're there, you see it moving around - and then knowing that that little moving flailing thing is growing inside me is another odd thing to think about.
What we're working on now: A fetus name we can both agree with - it's taking a while.

On another note: Final dress rehearsals for Anne of Green Gables this week (if you're in the area, come and watch!), pray for strength for me to get through this week without collapsing from exhaustion, remember that post in August about "and if I'm pregnant, it's like God throwing a chainsaw into the mix of stuff I'm juggling"...well, he did it - and He's given me the strength to survive, but MAN am I tired!

Remember back when I wasn't experiencing morning sickness...

And was all worried because of that...sigh...those were the days my friend. It's been the second time in three days that I threw up (dinner this time), and I realized that rather than worrying, I should have been ENJOYING the fact I wasn't throwing up. Why, because throwing up sucks! Plus it's totally destroying my "I never throw up" story (didn't for years - from the age of 10 or 12 or something until my second knee surgery...now I can't say that anymore). Oh well, there's definitely a baby in there!!