Restitis

I'm discovering that I have a certain disease - I actually think it's a pretty common disease. It's called restitis (my term), which, of course means that I'm allergic to rest. Here's two examples. This Spring Break I didn't want to teach the Friday before it - which I'm sure is a common phenomena. I was feeling a LITTLE tired & under the weather, but nothing to miss school over, but I decided to ask for the day off on Friday anyway - why not - what's the worst a little extra sleep can do? Well - I got SO sick that I could barely talk on Friday - and remained sick for most of the holiday, recovering just in time for school to be back in session. Now, at the time I was pregnant and not super excited about taking extra pills and drugs to stay remotely ok, so I suffered big time.

It's the end of the year. Now, the year doesn't end the same way it does in March where you're Teaching, then OFF and then Teaching again. No, the end of the year DRAGS on, due to being finished teaching two weeks before school is officially over, which means rather than getting full blown sick right off, I've been suffering with a runny nose, a sore throat, coughing and more bit by bit, piece by piece as the week goes on. It means I'm not being terribly effective or efficient because I'm not feeling great - and it means I'm not being super happy about going TO work, but don't really have a reason to call in "sniffling". I'm hoping that I get over this before July - because if this is all just leading up to something worse once school's officially over - I won't be too happy.

Ah well. Otherwise Life is Good. and since I've known about restitis for some time, I was kind of expecting it and I'm glad it's not worse this year.

Enjoy your day!

God vs. the Blog

Ladies and Gentlemen - it has come down to this:

In this corner we have the incredibly fun BLOG - that's right ladies and gentlemen - the perfectly wonderful thing that allows you to not only put your ideas out there for the world to see, but also allows you to do it from the comfort of your own home FREE OF CHARGE! People can keep in touch, you can find out what's going on in your friend's lives and you can do it whenever you want!! (personally, Deb finds first thing in the morning before school an effective time).

AND in THIS corner...

GOD - that's right, the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords - the Creator of the universe, and the chickpea. Not only is He incredible - but he wants to have a personal relationship with you, that's right YOU! You have the opportunity to talk to him whenever you want - at the drop of a hat, he'll listen, you just need to make the decision to do it! In fact, taking a little bit of time out of your day will help out your mental, emotional and sometimes even physical health! Is it worth it - YOU BET (personally, Deb finds first thing in the morning before school an effective time to do this).

Ahhhh...and there's the rub. Do I go on the internet, or do I spend some time reading the bible and praying? IN the past little while, I've decided to choose reading the bible over blogging. What does that mean? Well, for me it means a little bit of good mental health and reconnection with God, whom I like to think is a pretty important part of the world I'm in. What does it mean for YOU...it means you get a few less blogs in a month, and for that I apologize. The battle was over pretty quick. God approached Blogging, looked it in the eye (blogger started to cry at that point), and didn't even have to deliver a pulverizing blow before blogger threw in the towel. Once again - God wins.

Enjoy the blog.

Guess what I did for the first time today...?

Yeah that's right. I graduated from just SITTING on the bike, and sometimes riding BEHIND someone to actually being the person on the bike. SO EXCITING. So nervous. That's a lot of weight and responsibility. And if it falls on me, I'm the one with the crushed leg. But it didn't fall, I barely even stalled it (well, only about 4 or 5 times!). I'll have a nice but not major bruise on my leg from having to kick start the bike, and not doing it all that well...but MAN - how fun is this.

I only rode around in circles, and only in first and second. I wanted to end my first lesson on a good note, rather than feeling overwhelmed and failing at something. My stomach was all in knots, but man was I ever having fun!

So begins the saga of Deb getting her license. You saw me with my learners, now you see me on the bike, hopefully soon you'll see me cheering because I have my license!

I've got more posts to post, but I'll leave it at this for now!

YAY!

Oh yeah, and as a side note: Kids - do NOT ride in only shorts and a t-shirt UNLESS you are only riding in very slow circles around a parking lot. Otherwise - always wear proper riding gear! You should know better!! (and now you do!)

Thank You Cards...

I know it's been a long time since my last post - for that I apologize - I'd write you a card BUT...

I am writing today about thank you cards (or just cards in general, I suppose). I have many MANY friends getting married this summer (which is lots of fun), and many of those friends live in the area, which means I get to go to their weddings (also fun) BUT it also means I get to go to lots of showers. Now, I know I put a but in there - that's not to say that I don't enjoy showers (although I will definitely say that some are MUCH more fun than others - but that's another post). I enjoy the showers - and I love giving gifts to people who mean a lot to me, it's fun to bless them with stuff I know they'll enjoy a lot BUT (here it comes) - all these people who I give gifts to have been writing me thank you cards!!

Now, it's not to say I don't like thank you cards. In fact, I love them. I got a great one this week that included the words "pee my pants" which is always a great phrase to get in any card, but receiving cards that are meaningful (not just "Thank you for the pot it was nice" which obviously mean the writer of said card is completely tired of writing thank you cards) and directed just to my relationship with that person is great - but is makes me feel guilty. VERY Guilty...and here's why.

When I got married many moons ago (those moons would be mostly from Brad, although some from the sky), I didn't give out thank you cards for up to ONE YEAR! I started off with good intentions, but got lazy, got frustrated, got Brad to do some (which means I just ended up doing them, MUCH later) and basically didn't get them done. I was putting cards in mailboxes at a work I no longer worked at (and hadn't for MONTHS) for a shower they'd thrown for me two months before I left the job. I got the ones done for our relatives before we saw them a month after the wedding, but once that initial rush was over, we just never did do them. Some people, in fact, have never been given their thank you card - it got to be so late I was just too embarrassed.

I loved the gifts, I cared about the people, but I just couldn't do it on time. Which says something about cards in general. I had my Mother's Day cards two weeks early. When did my mother-in-law get hers mailed to her - a week late (at least I sent it from another province, so the cool factor of that must account for something). Christmas cards this year - not done. Thank you cards from Brad for donations for his trip a year ago - never written. "I think you're great" cards - they just never make it beyond the well thought out plan phase.

SO - I would like to say two things - for those of you who are amazing at sending cards to us. Thank you. I LOVE them, I put them up on my mantle, they mean a lot, and you are INCREDIBLE for putting in the effort to giving them to us.

For those of you who feel you deserve a card from me - my deepest apologies. You may never get one, ever. I thank you from the bottom of my heart HERE for all the things you will ever do for me. And if you REALLY want a card - please leave a comment, and I'll do my best to make sure you get something within the month of when you deserved such a card. You are all wonderful - cards or not.

On Mother's Day...

To my Mother

Thank you for being my mom. Thank you for all of the things you taught me over the 27 years you were a part of my life. You taught me grace in any circumstance. You taught me unconditional love (and were better at it than I am). Mom, I remember your hugs, your love, your willingness to talk about any and everything. You taught me about sacrifice, and the joy that brings. You showed me what it is to be a woman of prayer, and one who had a real relationship with our Father.

You showed me trust, and treated me with respect, and allowed me to live my life, without imposing rules on me that could have made me "safer", but kept me from growing. You showed me the value I had in life and told me I was worth it when I wanted to buy that outfit that was mint green and pink with a matching scrunchie (I have since learned I'm worth so much more than that...thank goodness)! You taught me that laughter is important, and family meals, and regular affection, and an open and honest relationship with anyone is more valuable to both of you than any platitudes. You taught me how to be a good mother one day, and were a great Oma to your grandkids, even the ones you won't meet on this earth.

Mom, sometimes I want to call, and I'm reminded you're not here. I think of you when I think of going shopping for my birthday, when I think of going to a play in Vancouver, when I have a counter full of dirty dishes and when I just want a hug.

You taught me what a legacy is - and how it is formed by each moment of each day leading up to the end of your life.

I miss you.

To my Mother-In-Law

I truly love you. You have blessed me with your amazing son. If not for the way you raised him, I would not have such a wonderful husband today. You taught him respect for women, and for all people. You taught him how to listen, how to take notice of the life around him and a genuine heart for the people in his life. You taught him wisdom, and the value of a strong woman in a marriage.

You have also taught me. You've taught me that it's necessary to speak up and have an opinion on things. That "if we both thought the same thing all the time, that one of us would be unnecessary". You taught me that respect and love don't mean acquiescing and cooking dinner every night. You taught me that a career is important. That continuing to grow as a woman, as a person, is a lifelong endeavour to be cherished and developed.

I have cherished our morning chats over breakfast, TV and the newspaper. I have appreciated the way you opened your home and shared your Christmas with someone who was "just a friend". I have loved how you have opened your family to me, and allowed me to be part of such a special and wonderful group of people. I love the way you and dad continue to be a blessing in our lives in so many ways.

You have taught me what it is to be strong - not hard, but the strength that is evident even in vulnerable moments.

I love you.

To my Future Stepmother

MaryAnna, I am thankful you have become a part of my life. You are a blessing to my dad, and a joy to share my time with. You are an amazing woman. I appreciate that you never tried to force yourself into a relationship with me that I wasn't willing to have. You simply cared about me, and let me know that. You have a great family - and I'm glad that I'm going to be a part of it. I could not have imagined a woman who will fit so well into my father's life as you are - challenging him, and loving him both. You have gone through a lot, but you refuse to be afraid of the future because of that. You continually open your heart and your home, in a way that is so natural and comfortable.

You laugh, you think, you are self sufficient, you are a woman of Faith. You are a blessing to those who know you.

I am glad you will be here in my future. You will not take the place of my mother, but you don't want to. You have simply found a new place in my life, and I like it that you're there.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

I am so thankful to be a part of such an incredible family of women of Noble Character. God has put you all in my life - I don't know why, but I am grateful. I hope I will continue to grow more like each of you, as you reflect God's love to the world, may I learn from all of my mothers' lives.

Strange Vomit...

**Note - the following really does have to do with strange vomit, so if you've made a pact with yourself to avoid funny vomit stories, please, read no further**

Some of you may know this about me, many of you probably don't. I do not have a history of throwing up. In fact, I have a history of NOT throwing up. Other than knee surgery (where I threw up many times, and my loving husband was there to throw out the vomit, as I couldn't walk, and to feed me more juice to throw up at a later time) OTHER than that, I used to be able to say that I hadn't thrown up since I was about 12 years old. Not too shabby, eh?

Like I said - used to. I figured, what with getting pregnant and all, that record would not stand, but lucky me, I managed to avoid throwing up the entire few weeks I was pregnant (ha - I've finally figured out how to avoid morning sickness...) and NOW, not that I am most definately NOT pregnant - I throw up.

But HOW did I throw, as I said - it's strange. I was walking down the road, drinking pop. Something many of us do on a regular basis - both walking, and drinking pop, and perhaps, something you have even done recently together. As I did. Suddenly I felt the urge to belch. Being a teacher, that urge often has to be quashed, which is not as fun. So...seeing as there was no one around, and I was out and about and there wasn't going to be anyone seeing or hearing me, I figured now was a GREAT time to belch away. And so I did. Only it turns out, it wasn't a belch - somehow, instead of just air coming up the windpipe, there was food that had formerly gone down that felt the urge to come back up. And so it did. And I threw up. Just a little - enough to get it up my nose, not enough to leave an obvious mark on the road. And then I kept walking home. And laughed to myself.

Here I am - not drinking alcohol, not drunk, yet walking down the road and puking like a drunkard. For no aparent reason. I went home, and called Brad and laughed as I told him.

I don't know if the fake belch / vomit thing is a common occurence, or if it's just one more thing that makes me special, but it sure made me laugh!

What the heck???

Ladies and Gentlemen - welcome to the underbelly of Langley BC...



I apologize for the blurriness - this was taken out of a car window as we were driving by. This is the highest we've seen it yet - I'll keep you updated with more blurry pictures.

Brad and I went Shopping...

And we bought a new DIGITAL CAMERA!! YAY. This is a camera just for me, basically. It's cute and small, but will still work well and have enough features to take some cool wedding shots. We bought it so I've got a bit of time to figure it out before Tiff & Brynn's wedding next weekend (wow, that's coming fast!).

So, without further ado (adieu?) (A-Doo) I give you *imagine trumpets trumpeting...* the first picture I took on my NEW CAMERA!!


P.S. after all, what else do trumpets do?

I just got my "L"!!

**The Following is a drama BASED on a true story**

Deb enters the school on Monday morning around 10:00 am. She is later than normal to work, but on time for her first class of teaching. Deb bounds upstairs to the sewing room where Sue (who knows Deb was taking her test) is teaching. Deb pulls out a yellow piece of paper and starts smiling and jumping up and down.

Sue: You did it!

Deb: Yep! Woo hoo!!

Sue gives Deb a hug while students gather, looking confused. Deb looks at the class.

Deb: I just got my learners!

Random Student: You just got your learners? What?

Other Student: You mean you can't drive? What?

Deb: Oh, I can drive...

Other Student: You mean you've been driving illegally all these years? What?

Deb: Yes...in fact, I believe I've even driven you around, haven't I...(grins evilly)

Random Student: I'm confused. You JUST got your learners?

Deb: Yep...for my MOTORCYCLE!!

Students look at Deb with varied mixtures of shock, respect and a sense that thier drama teacher is completely insane (all of which are true and legitimate feelings about me by the way).

RS: Are you going to get a motorcycle?

Deb: I already have two!

RS: Really!? (more shock, respect and a little fear)

Deb: Yep!

This conversation happened about 15 times throughout the day, and always ended with one of two endings. Either students asked about what KIND of motorcycles I had, or, if they knew nothing about motorcycles, they'd ask about how the test was, and how I did (it was easy and I got 100%, although I did skip a few questions along the way). Either way the very end of the conversation would be me telling them that I was going to be taking lessons before I attempted to get on a big and scary bike, and that I was super excited.

So, the moral of this little play is:
YAY - I GOT MY MOTORCYCLE LEARNERS!! I'm going to be a motorcyclist!! WOO HOO! And kids: don't play with matches.

The End.

More and More Changes...

It's like once things start to be different in your life, an avalanche of things are different. I went from wanting a change to getting pregnant. From being pregnant and looking forward to that change to not being pregnant. From still wanting change to deciding to drop to part time at my teaching job and pursuing alternative ways of making money. From getting a small job as our church's secretary (hooray!!) to finding out dropping to part time at school might not be the best idea financially if I'm going on mat leave at some time in the future. From finding that out, to being offered MORE teaching time at the school!!

So, in the span of less than a month, I have officially become a non-mother, church secretary and Drama teacher for Grades SIX to Twelve. How exciting, and intimidating at the same time. And for all you teachers out there, I'd just like to say how happy I am to be making up two new courses the same year the government review is coming to our school expecting perfect course outlines. In the end, God takes care of us, He lets us know we need to work on taking care of ourselves, and then once we decide how we're going to do that, He changes everything anyway to something even better. Not a bad way to work things eh?

Three Cheers for Student Loans...

Brad and I have been trying to look on the positive in regards to our student loans for the last 10 years (sigh, has it been that long?? Yes...and longer...SIGH). So, every time we go down another 1000 it's cause to celebrate. This year we paid off Brad's loan (HOORAY!!!!!), although I got a statement from Stupid Bank (aka Scotia) the other day informing me that once again, he has $0 and he owed $0. It's been 9 months or so, hopefully they'll figure it out eventually. We also paid off my PROVINCIAL loan (HOORAY!!!!!) at the same time last year, so now we're down to only one loan - which is my Federal loan. SO, we still have reasons to celebrate on a semi-regular basis. This time, we can celebrate being under $13,000. Yay...sigh...Oh well. It's still good to see it going down. And hopefully, by the time we have to re-mortgage our house in 5 years, it'll be paid off. Wouldn't that be amazing? But it's ok, because in 2004 we had $27,000 still to pay, so we've made some very good progress in the last 3 years, I'd say (thanks Mom & Dad J, for your help with the very good progress). That's not bad. and thus, three cheers for Student Loans: One's paid: HOORAY, another's paid: HOORAY, and one's shrinking slowly....yay. Hey, I didn't say they all had to be the same volume of cheering, right??

My Husband's an Incredible Writer...

He's got his own blog and wrote something that I really enjoyed reading, so I thought I'd pass it along. It's at http://www.livingmartyrs.com/2007/04/screaming-in-soundproof-room.html. He's talented - that's part of what I like about him.

Caught in the 'Net

I've been finally putting some real work into getting my Dodge Coronet in order. I've ripped out much of the fabric and plastic from the interior, and my primary job is to now smooth and prep the metal for paint. This car is going to have a real rough and ready appearance, especially from the inside. I'm going to make it as basic as I can, and then gradually continue to refine it for however long I'm able to keep it. I'm working over all the surface with a wire brush on the end of a drill, and so far all nearly all the rust I've seen has given way to shiny metal underneath. (Yay!) I'm also cutting off the metal upholstery 'tangs' with my Dremel-clone. Those things get hot when you cut them off -- I had one seal itself to the vinyl seat. Good thing the seat covers are already shot!

It's a restoration process that takes real work, but what I'm doing now is being rewarded with less work later. It's a metaphor -- if you get to the corrosion in time, you can save it with a little work. If not, it's major surgery!

Making noise in the basement of a condo is kinda fun, but I wonder when I'll get the official word to stop. Though, you know, it's not like I'm hurting anyone. Yet... And with me being downstairs so much, I'm getting to meet a few neighbours. Well, at least the ones who aren't nervously and furtively scurrying away, desperately trying to avoid eye contact. Living in a condo has some really funny moments...

Pictures have been requested. Here are a couple of 'before' shots of the Coronet. Now the car now looks even more 'before'. Eventually that'll change -- I'll try to keep the process alive here.

Feeling Much Better

Well, since I've been keeping you all pretty well informed, I figure I may as well continue to keep you well informed. I've been feeling much better this weekend, Friday was a tiring day, from announcing things in church, to feeling quite sad all day, to it being Good Friday, which is often a day for quieter reflection - it was tough. It was also the end of a very long week. I had a good cry at the end of the day - I was still having physical pain, and that was a little scary too.

Friday seemed to be a turning point, though. Saturday was a little better, Sunday our service was good, I directed a play and that went over really well, and it just felt good for people to know, and to be able to move on because of that. It no longer felt like there was a big secret in our lives. There are many women (and families) in our church that can share my pain, because there are many who have experienced it - and that too was a comfort. As well, after Friday the physical pain subsided, which relieved some of my fears. Now things physically seem to be mostly over, which is a really nice feeling, and I think it helps me to be able to recover emotionally as well.

Making connections with people, getting it out in the open, and being able to be honest about what I've been through, both with myself, with people close to me, and to a wider circle of our church and work families has been such a blessing. God has placed amazing people in my life who have been such a comfort in many ways in the last week. I feel like I can start to look outside myself again a little bit, which is a nice place to be.

I'm not saying I'm not still sad, I'm not saying it's not still weird. There are still times I feel pregnant, and still times where something happens and I'm like "Oh, that's a pregnancy symptom" and I have to remind myself that it's not, BUT I'm continuing down the road that felt like it was at a dead stop last week, and I feel like that's a good place to be in right now.

Thank you for continuing to pray - we can feel the strength it brings us.

It's Spring!!

It's been a strange week here. Monday morning, as Brad drove me to the doctor's office and the hospital, we had snow on the ground, and on the trees (which was weird, with blossoms and snow). By the end of the day, in parts of Langley, it was summery and nice enough to wear a T-Shirt! (Brad has mentioned it was a three season day) We've discovered, since moving to the top of the "hill" in Murrayville that the small change in elevation actually impacts the weather, as we have snow, and keep it much longer than people down the hill (and it's really not a very big hill). It's kind of funny!

Yesterday was Good Friday, and William announced our miscarriage in church. We decided that being part of a church family meant they needed to know what was going on in our lives. As well, after doing a play rehearsal on Wednesday night, I realized that it was too hard to do church things and have no one know the incredible change that has happened in our lives, so he announced it, and we reflected on Jesus' death, and I know that because of sin in the world, our baby is dead, but because of Jesus, our baby is in heaven. It was a hard service to sit through, I was thankful Brad was beside me.

There's this real dichotomy in the world right now for me. I see trees bursting with flowers, I see daffodils and crocuses out everywhere. Buds are forming on trees that don't flower, people are starting to wear shorts and feel summery, and every time I think about the life that is developing around me after a long stark winter, I also remember that there is death in the world. It's a weird thing to celebrate life and suffer death in the same breath, but I feel like that's what I've been doing a lot recently. Thankfully, even with the sadness, there's also comfort and peace. God has surrounded me with a good church family, an incredible group of friends in the area and far away, amazing family members who are walking this road with us, and a spouse who is there for me, to comfort me, to make me laugh and to ride the roller coaster that are my moods this week. I am so thankful for his patience and understanding during this week.

Life is hard, but God is good.
He blesses us everyday, even this week.