Independence Day

Independence...ahhh....independence. It's great - but, it's painful. We all need to develop independence - I see the desperate need for that in kids I teach who are STILL driven to school (they live down the street), who are in Grade 11, in kids who still have a curfew in university, whose parents get to determine their friends in university, who ask their profs when parent teacher interviews are....(that story I "heard", I don't know anyone personally who tried that particular one out).

At the same time, if we have too much independence, it's not healthy either. It can lead to unnecessary isolation from those we need - emotionally, physically, intellectually, spiritually. Finding that balance is something I'm reminded of everytime I'm carrying a baby and five bags & someone offers to help and I say "I've got it". Then in my head I say "I'm a moron, why NOT ask for help? Why not accept that I'm part of a bigger community that's here for me?" It's a challenge to find that line. I don't want to be clingy and needy, but I also need to be in community with friends and others who will take care of me. People have volunteered. People LOVE to help out with babies - and yet I feel alone. And so many moms feel alone. All of us, alone and independent, because we wouldn't want to admit that help is vital, and necessary, and good.

Perhaps we should all take a little break from all our independence.

Except babies. They're allowed to be independent. This post was inspired by one written by my sister-in-law who has a son who's a week older than Aria (not all of you know this story, for those of you who do...I apologize). He's developing independence in spades. Read it here, and you'll see what Aria's been doing these days...only more cautiously (after all, she is Aria).

When Brad got home from Saskatchewan she was so excited she started showing off to him, I'd never seen her do it before, and she seems to only do it when he's around, but she'll spin in circles and go "Wheeeee....Wheeeeee....Wheeeeee...." Oh my goodness, it's so adorable.

Other things that are fun enough to go "Wheee..." :
Driving in the car around corners
Jumping from mom to dad in the pool
Sliding down slides
Throwing balls
Dancing to kids music (thanks again, Bec)
Just...sitting...

Yeah - she's not super picky.

Other things she's doing to show her growing independence / physical development:
Climbing stairs: 75% on her hands and feet, 25% holding on to a railing, on her own (only up so far standing)
walking backwards. We were on our way home from Fernie the first time she did this, she was holding my hand and she tried walking off the sidewalk, and it was a rather steep incline, and so she backed up onto the sidewalk. I thought it was weird, and couldn't figure out why - and suddenly realized that she was walking backward.
Climbing into her stroller on her own...a good indication it's time to get out of the house! Once she fell out when the shade cover gave way on her and she fell backwards...oh well.
Climbing onto our patio from the ground. Dirty, but good to know she can do it.
Falling asleep on her own in her crib.

And so much more, but she's woken up now, so I gotta go.

Deb

It's SO hot...

It's so hot it feels like Ontario - except we don't have the coping mechanisms in place here, such as AC in every building & car - so we're all just melting.

SO...does anyone have a great "it's so hot..." comparison?

It's so hot you could fry an egg on the sidewalk
It's so hot my sprinkler evaporates before it even gets to me

Yo mama so hot....oh no wait, wrong kinda hot...

Anyone else??

Oh yeah, it may be hot like Ontario - but there's still almost no mosquitoes - one thing I'm especially grateful for hearing Brad's Northern Saskatchewan stories.

Come on guys...It's so hot...?

Random Childhood Memory

Aria has just learned to spin in place. This is highly amusing to watch, especially because she gets such a kick out of it. "Wheeeeee!" It reminded me of something from my own childhood:

When I was a young kid and I got the hiccups, I'd start spinning until I got dizzy. That way I could see what being drunk was like. :-)

Oh what a week it has been...

Brad's been away this week *coming back today...YAY* from Wednesday - which was his birthday - to tonight. It has been a TOUGH week.

Here's a brief summary:
Aria's molars are coming in.
That means fussy baby
That means she doesn't want to eat
That means she's hungry
That means a fussy baby
It's been HOT here
That means a fussy baby
That means she doesn't want to eat
That means she's hungry
That means a fussy baby

She's wanting to be independent, and yet, wants me around CONSTANTLY.

Did I mention she's teething?
Did I mention there's a heat wave coming...that's right, it's not here yet...it's still COMING...!!

Remember when I posted that Aria slept through the night? That only happened once. Now she's up 2-4 times in a night with heat / teeth issues, I can't guess which is which - or if she's just HUNGRY because of the not eating in the daytime.

And Brad's not here, so I'm doing this on my own. I don't get a break. Which is hard.
I'm trying to get out a LOT just to maintain sanity - for some reason, Aria is a whole lot happier when she's away - she's great at making everyone else in the world think she's a perfect giggly happy wonderful baby - and then she gets home and she throws her TRAY on the ground (that's right, not just the food, the entire tray - three times this week), and cries and fusses and clings and pulls and then wants me to leave her alone.

BUT

Some of the things that have helped me maintain my sanity:

1. Every day I have gotten at least one wonderful arms wrapped around my neck hug that just lets me know that she loves me.
2. When we go out, those smiles & giggles and compliments from everyone else are great to hear.
3. She makes friends with others instantly - from putting her arms out to be held by a friend of a friend, to kids in the pool, to teenagers who started watching their language when she was around, to people from an addiction house who go to our church (what a challenge that is every week to ME).
4. We went to Sendall Gardens where there's a decorative waterfall & a little pool of water at the top and bottom. Aria went swimming (I went wading - we were both in the same depth of water).
5. We went to McDonalds and Aria experienced her first play place. She LOVED it.
6. We've been to the pool twice. I think she likes watching the kids more than she cares about being in the water.
7. She's started personifying her dolls - so when it's time for her to get a new diaper or go to bed, I'll do it for her doll first, and she'll go along and "help" them go to sleep (and fall asleep herself).
8. Falling asleep hasn't been hard, just the staying asleep part.
9. We got a kids CD from my sister, and every time she hears it, she starts to dance along to the songs. She LOVES it therefore, I love it.
10. There was a thunder & lightning storm the other night - we went up to the 4th floor and looked out the window at the storm. Aria loved the flashes & noise. No fear - good, I want to instil that in her!
    
11. I have a picture of me & my Mom out. She regularly picks it up and looks at it, and this morning saw it and said "Oma". Yesterday she was giving me, me in the photo and Oma in the photo kisses - how wonderful.
12. She's found her belly button - and can tickle herself by touching it. I have seen more people's belly buttons in the last few weeks...and she giggles every time she sees someone's, and then proudly shows off hers.
13. I fed her raisins for the first time. She ate & I gave her more, which she ate, so I gave her more, which she ate...so I gave her more...and she opened her mouth, and they all came out! I was so proud, and then I just had to chuckle. And then Aria mimicked my chuckle! THAT was funny - the little shoulder shake & nose exhaling...from a 16 month old! Oh yeah, then she ate the raisins.
    
14. When she is happy and playful - it's the most wonderful thing in the world.
    

So - it's been SUPER tough at times, and incredibly wonderful at times. I am thankful God gives us the patience to persevere, and helps keep things in perspective - like they say in AA - one day at a time...

And did I mention, Brad's coming home tonight? All you single moms out there - WOW! I don't know if I could do what you do!

Attempted Bed Time Story

Once upon a time there was a little girl named Aria. Her Dad asked her to bring him her favourite book in the whooooole world, so that he could read it to her. But instead she brought him one of his shoes. And so they all lived Nike-ly ever after.

The end.

Sleep...

Well, Aria's been doing a lot of it since all the cousins (and aunts & uncles) have left. Two nights ago she slept through the night for the first time since about this time last year. Last night, not so much. It was a struggle to put her down (thanks, Brad - I was out) and she lasted only until about 5. *sigh*

One of the best pieces of advice Brad & I received about parenting came from his dad, who told us that parenting is not linear. Keeping that in mind means we celebrate the new (sleeping longer), but don't hold onto it too tightly. I know she'll sleep through the night again, but I didn't go to bed last night expecting it.

A Lot of Catching Up.

It's been a while since we posted, and we've done LOTS. Here's a brief overview, in video & picture form.

One day I was in the kitchen, and Aria was playing happily in the living room. Suddenly I hear the "I've gotten myself into a pickle, and need help" cry, so I head to the living room, and do a quick scan. What has she climbed on that she needs help getting off of...nothing. Where is she??? No where...then I hear the cry again, coming from the corner...and there's Aria.


Our bookshelf is on an angle from the wall, and she made her way between the two! So cute!

Aria & I went to Vancouver to pick up a lens one day while Brad was at work. I figured I'd wear her out in Vancouver, rather than have her nap there, and then be frustrated back. I wore her out and then we drove back at nap time #2. This is Aria's first picture at the Gastown Steam Clock. I'm guessing there will be many more as time goes on!

This was done on Father's Day, and just hasn't made it up yet. They're fairly self explanatory.

We always say "Grandpa", but she's started saying "Papa" from the very beginning. I'm looking forward to finding out which one is going to stick!

This last one in the series - you can hear her say "Opa" right at the beginning of the clip. For those of you who don't know, Opa is the Dutch name for Grandpa.

Happy Father's Day. Happy July! Family pictures are coming next!